Forgive the throwback to Rob Base and DJ EasyE. That song has a line about sunshine and it makes me giggle to hear it. There was a disturbance recently, a ripple if you will that somehow bounced a part of me and I didn’t even see it coming. Yet again, it was a kiss, just a simple kiss on the way somewhere else and it knocked me on my ass. What happened afterwards was textbook delirium. I vacillated between absolute joy and terror. It’s as if all of the armor I’ve been wearing just disappeared.
I knew going in that this was a road to nowhere right now and still my damn heart skipped too many beats to be counted. I’ve spent the better part of the last week trying to figure out how this happened. A root cause analysis if you will as to why and/or how this could have skirted my very well fortified perimeter. If I’m honest, I still don’t know. How you manage to quite literally wander into a level of peace that hasn’t been around for a long time, looooong time is beyond me. Ok – yes – I am a silly and hopeless romantic. I’m ok with this. I also, despite a good deal of cynicism, believe this connection was too familiar, too easy, too everything (well not everything to my chagrin).
As I laid in bed last night and drifted off to sleep, I was hit with this image of this great tapestry of friends and experiences I’ve had with them. Things I regret, things I can’t believe happened, laughs, tears, anger: most of what I felt drifting off to sleep was gratitude and love.
I believe whatever is going to happen will happen and also remember that the times in my life when I have pushed for something I wanted, I ended up regretting it. So, here I am, back on the street again, fully armored with a smile, a quick joke and a wink. My life is full and fantastic. I am luckier than maybe I deserve and it’s alright by me. I can’t stop smiling. Maybe Bill Withers was onto something – then again maybe not. Sunshine’s not gone, it’s just, as an old friend says, shining behind the clouds and will be back again at some point.
https://youtu.be/Nuanwn3v-2I?si=JmudNec4ImzRNnFZ (Mr. Withers if you please)
Until then, keep smiling, keep laughing, be kind to others and mostly yourself. Be someone’s rock and stay salty.